Boo!

Dictionary.com defines the word fear as: 

a distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined; the feeling or condition of being afraid. 

Fear comes in many different shapes and sizes. Whether it may be an object that you fear (spiders, snakes), an occurrence that frightens you (drowning, burning), or an abstract fear (stage fright, being rejected), fear is just a part of our lives.
     I wouldn't say that fear runs my life, because that is an extremely false statement. But it's not like I'm immune to fear! Of course I absolutely hate spiders and snakes, and drowning and burning would just awful. But what I am really trying to conquer in my life right now are those darn abstract fears. As I mentioned in my first post, I am absolutely terrified a little nervous about getting old. Call me crazy, but it's true. Not only will I be completely responsible for taking care of myself and my future family. I'll have to have a reliable job, help pay the bills (along with my caring, kind, Christian husband who can play the guitar and loves to play with my hair), make sure my two children (a little boy 1-2 years older than my little girl) are safe and happy, and then not to mention getting really old!  Something about having the possibility of being thrown into a nursing home plus getting wrinkles just freaks me out! 
       But no matter how fearful I am of getting old, I am a normal teenage girl. Rejection, in all honesty, is my number one fear. Who isn't afraid of being rejected though? Being rejected by friends, peers, teachers, colleges, directors, the world in general; the list is endless. But I mean this is normal, right?? {sigh} Anyways, I have been trying to conquer this fear for a little while. And despite how lengthy this process has been, and will continue to be, so far it has been successful. Trying out for our Spring musical last year was the most horrifying thing I have ever done! I had never sang in front of anyone before and did not want people walking around school the next talking about how horrible I was; let's just quote my good friend Kim by saying that "my leg grew a personality of it's own". I was shaking, sweating, gasping for air. Yupp. I was that girl... Well luckily, most of the side effects (except for the leg thing) stopped before my actual audition. I went home afterward and cried my eyes out. I thought I did just awful. Turns out, I got a part!!! Now, that one audition has changed my life for the best! I am in love with performing and singing now! All I had to do was conquer that fear of being rejected to find out so much more about myself than I could have imagined. 
      I still struggle with that fear though and I'm not afraid to admit it. I'm not made of stone, ya know! Anyways, in case anyone is actually reading this someone else is struggling with fear in their life. Here are some verses that have helped me very much. 


Romans 8:39 Neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Jesus Christ our Lord.

Deuteronomy 31:6 Be strong and of good courage, do not fear nor be afraid of them; for the LORD your God, He is the One who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you.

Psalm 27:1 The LORD is my light and my salvation; Whom shall I fear? The LORD is the strength of my life; Of whom shall I be afraid? 

Psalm 56:3-4 When I am afraid, I will trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can mortal man do to me?

PS. If you are actually reading this, let me know so that I can know whether I am just typing to my computer. :) And if you are reading, thanks.